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At a quiet table in a dimly lit Lower East Side Italian restaurant, Lauren Urasek, a poised 23-year-old makeup artist with a Cleopatra haircut and cherry-red lipstick, is lit by the glow of her i Phone as she flips through online-dating messages. You’re like the girl I would make a profile of if I was making my ideal match. not usually into girls with tats but ur sexy we should chill i got a huge cock … In New York, online dating is practically a municipal utility, connecting millions of strangers.

I think I literally said out loud, “Yes, you.” “That’s kind of normal,” she says, ­sipping a bourbon on the rocks. To find out how some people manage to stand apart from the masses, and how it feels to be so desired, I asked Rudder to introduce me to the most popular OKCupid daters in the city in four categories—straight and gay women and straight and gay men.

“I get so many of those …” I would swim the Amazon upstream with an airtank filled with Rosie O’Donnell’s queefs … ­“Seventy percent of the messages are straight-up blunt, vulgar shit. you need to not approach it that way.” On the free online-dating site ­OKCupid­, Lauren is known as nebulaeandstuff: 23. I found her after a conversation with ­OKCupid­ co-founder Christian Rudder, who famously crunched the site’s user data on the blog ­OKTrends­ and sold a book based on it, Dataclysm, for seven figures.

he’s from South Dakota,” Lauren says, turning off her phone, which will ping with a dozen new queries before the waiter brings the check. Lauren receives around three dozen emails a day; in the last seven months, she’s received five-star ratings, the highest possible rating, from nearly 8,000 men.

Just look at how many people seeking dates or mates are flocking to matchmaking sites and apps.

“How you self-identify on the site, and how you’re going to be perceived on your date by your date, is going to be a point of potential insecurity,” one Ok Cupid user, Alana Massey, 28, told ABC News.

However, site co-founder Sam Yagan said the filter option is, well, just an option.

Rudder analyzed the data from a one-week period in January and used a simple methodology: finding the users who receive the most messages from potential suitors.

The four people selected wouldn’t necessarily claim to be the wealthiest, most stunning or successful singles, but, out of 400,000 annual citywide users on the site, they were among the top five in their respective categories and, perhaps less scientifically, were the four who were also willing to be interviewed for a story.